Why am I standing still?

I am supposed to be cleaning but I just want to get get some thing on paper and off of my mind. I just left the grocery store where I spent WAY to much money on not a lot of food. The joy of Sam's club...sigh Mike will not be pleased but it is all in the name of girls night. Yeah.

So I just went and visited my friend Robyn and her new baby Aimee. (Aimee is super cute and she is so cuddly and lovey!! She is adorable!!) Now I went to visit Robyn with my friend Melissa who is pregnant with baby Zoey. When we were there we were all discussing whats new with our lives. Melissa was talking about finishing her masters and getting ready to have Zoey and trying to sell her house. Robyn was talking about her new baby, her toddler and her new house. We also started talking about some of our friends and everything that is going on in their lives. It made me feel really inadequate. They all have graduated and most of them are working on their masters or getting their nursing degrees. The majority of them are married, they are homeowners and most of them have kids or have kids on the way. My story was yeah Mike and I are still unpacking, nope no kids, nope still haven't gone back to school to get my degree, but I really want to. Nope still at the same job. Nope nothing new....sigh I hate that feeling that everyones life is moving forward and you are standing still.

I can't stress to you how happy I am with Mike. I love him so much and I am very happy with the life that we have together. (Minus the bills but everybody has those.) I just wish I was a little happier with myself. But I am working on that and hopefully everything will fall into place.

Where Has the Time Gone??

Ok so I can't believe that August is halfway over. Where has the year gone?? I am looking around my very messy house (Yes you can figure out that I have yet to clean it, good job give yourself a cookie) and realizing that I am going to have to clean it sometime within the next few months so we can put a christmas tree up. Wow what sad motivation to clean...although maybe I can use that to motivate Mike to clean....

Over the past few months I have gone on some mini summer adventures. My friend Annette & I have gone to the museum center where she went to the omnimax for the first time and also to the history museum. We told some pictures of the great history. As you can tell from the picture below that Annette really wanted to be friends with the sloth..

Annette and I also took a field trip to the zoo. We of course chose one of the hottest days to visit the zoo and were surrounded by a lot of daycare kids and kids on field trips. I felt really bad for the poor animals and how hot they were!!
So my favorite part of the zoo is the monkeys. Isn't this monkey super cute? I tried to convince Mike that we needed a monkey to come and live with us. I didn't win that argument of course. I tried a few different arguments to win my case but I didn't succeed!! I did realize later that Dave & Dante probably wouldn't like us to have a pet monkey either. I also don't think that the zoo would like for Annette & I to steal a monkey...

With all of my fun summer adventures my cleaning has fallen more by the wayside than usual. My plan is to get my house clean and in order by the time that my California girls come to town. It will be their first time to see the house and I think that it would be nice to have them see a clean, unpacked house!! So now that I am putting it out there I have two weeks to clean my house and get it organized! So Mike better get on board because it is time to clean!!

Overwhelmed...

Lately I have been feeling very overwhelmed. It seems like I can't get everything done at work that I want to do and the house is never going to be clean. I feel like I am constantly doing laundry or dishes or going to the grocery store. You know those everyday things that everyone has to do. I just feel like I have been sidetracked by other things on my mind and because of that I can't manage to do my daily tasks. I know that everyone has days, weeks and months like this.
I am very grateful for the things that I have in my life. I am married to the great love of my life and we are blessed to have a house, good jobs and wonderful families. The only thing missing from this picture is a little family of our own. I found out a few weeks ago that I may have fertility issues. I already had a slew of blood tests to rule out thyroid, hormone and other problems. I have been given medication to try to regulate things. If this doesn't work then I will have some ultrasounds done and possibly start hormones. The doctor told me that after we do that we might need to start thinking of other methods of having a baby. So Mike & I have talked and he keeps telling me that everything will work out and that we can always start our family through adoption. Did I mention that I love my husband?
I have always wanted to have a baby and ever since I met Mike I knew that I wanted to have his baby. It makes me sad to think that there might not be a mini Mike running around someday. I know that there is a baby out there for us whether it is ours biologically or not. I just don't want Mike to resent me ten years from now if I am not able to have his baby biologically.
It is hard to try not to worry about things when you don't have any answers. It would be so much easier if everything was black and white and someone would say "I'm sorry but..." or "there's nothing to worry about..." at least then I would know what is ahead of us. Until then it is just waiting and praying.
Hopefully I will be able to take my mind off of everything and focus on cleaning my house and getting things in order for my friends visit from CA. I am very excited to see her and her two beautiful girls. I love them and I know that they will help to keep me sidetracked and calm while they are here. Until then I am going to focus on the amazing blessings that I already have in my life.